Therapeutic Travel: Q&A with MELD CEO Owen Marcus on self-care getaways among men
Men's retreats have surged in popularity over the past two decades. They now span everything from silent meditation weekends and plant-medicine journeys to physically demanding rites of passage and leadership intensives. Yet despite the diversity, many men report the same outcome after attending. The experience feels powerful. Something opens. Then life resumes, and the change fades.
According to Owen Marcus, founder of MELD Prime and a long-time architect of men's retreat work, the reason most retreats do not create lasting change has little to do with intention or effort. It comes down to physiology. Many retreats focus on what men feel or realize in the moment, but not on how the body integrates that experience once the environment changes.
Understanding the landscape of men's retreats and how they work on the nervous system is the key to choosing one that changes more than your mood. It determines whether the shift becomes a new baseline or just a temporary high.
Below, Marcus explains the major categories of men's retreats, why most fall short, and why somatic, science-based approaches are reshaping what real transformation looks like.
Q: Men's retreats have exploded in popularity. Why do so many of them fail to produce lasting change?
Owen Marcus: Most retreats focus on experience rather than integration. Men leave feeling lighter, clearer, or emotionally open, but their nervous systems have not learned how to sustain those states under real-world stress. When daily pressures return, the body defaults to old survival patterns.
The difference between a temporary breakthrough and lasting transformation is physiology. If the body does not feel safe enough to relax and connect consistently, insight alone cannot hold.
Q: There are many types of men's retreats. Can you walk through the main categories and what they offer?
Marcus: There are eight broad types that show up again and again.
Adventure or rite-of-passage retreats rely on challenge, fasting, endurance, or extreme environments to awaken primal energy and a sense of initiation. They can be powerful for men seeking purpose or physical testing, but without nervous system regulation or emotional safety, the impact often fades.
Therapeutic or process-based retreats are rooted in psychotherapy and trauma release. They can produce deep emotional catharsis, especially for men dealing with grief or major life transitions. The limitation is that if the body is not stabilized afterward, insight fades and old wounds can reopen.
Spiritual or mindfulness retreats emphasize meditation, breathwork, and contemplation. They quiet the mind and expand awareness, but awareness alone does not teach the nervous system how to respond differently in relationships or under stress.
Ideological or men's movement retreats focus on specific beliefs about masculinity, leadership, or polarity. They often create energy and identity, but they risk replacing one rigid script with another rather than honoring individual truth.
Corporate or leadership retreats are common in professional settings. They focus on strategy, communication, and performance. They build cohesion, but they rarely touch emotional regulation, stress physiology, or vulnerability.
Healing or plant-medicine retreats can open profound experiences and insight. Without preparation, integration, and ongoing support, however, the nervous system cannot sustain the change and can even become destabilized.
Community or brotherhood retreats emphasize belonging and shared storytelling. Many men feel immediate relief simply realizing they are not alone. Without embodied practice, though, old habits return when stress hits.
Finally, there are somatic, science-based retreats. This is where physiology, emotion, and community are treated as one system. At MELD Prime, men learn to regulate their nervous systems, release chronic stress patterns, and reconnect safely with others. The work is causal, not symptomatic.
Q: What distinguishes somatic, science-based retreats from the others?
Marcus: They work from the inside out. Most programs start with mindset. MELD starts with the body.
The nervous system is not broken. It is adaptive. It learned to keep you safe at some point in your life. Those same adaptations can later limit your ability to relax, connect, and lead. When men understand concepts like allostatic load and coherence, they finally have a map for lasting change.
Allostasis explains how the body continually adjusts to meet life's demands. Chronic stress keeps that system on high alert, creating wear and tear that shows up as anxiety, burnout, disconnection, and even illness. MELD's work reduces allostatic load so energy becomes available for creativity, intimacy, and purpose.
Q: You often talk about regulation happening in layers. What does that mean in practice?
Marcus: There are three layers.
Physiological regulation comes first. Breath, posture, heart rate, and movement tell the brain whether you are safe. When those shift, the brain follows.
Emotional regulation comes next. Once the body settles, emotions can be felt without overwhelm. Men stop reacting from fear and begin responding from presence.
Relational regulation follows. Safety becomes contagious. Through eye contact, tone, pacing, and shared rhythm, the group helps each man return to balance. That is why we call the community a living nervous system.
When these layers align, coherence arises. The body, emotions, and relationships move together instead of pulling in different directions.
Q: Many retreats promise breakthroughs. What should men be cautious about when choosing one?
Marcus: Overpromising is the first red flag. If a retreat guarantees transformation in twenty-four hours, it is selling a high, not healing.
One-size-fits-all masculinity is another. If a retreat defines what it means to be a man for you, it is not respecting your biology or history.
Finally, look for aftercare. Real change requires integration and accountability beyond the weekend. Without community, the nervous system has no support structure to sustain new patterns.
Q: How is MELD Prime structured differently?
Marcus: MELD Prime is not a weekend escape. It is a four-day living laboratory.
Men learn to regulate their nervous systems in real time. They practice breath, grounding, pacing, and relational safety until those skills become embodied. The environment is supportive, not confrontational. One of our core agreements is that men can opt out at any time. Safety is the mechanism of change.
The work can be uncomfortable because it involves reconnecting with parts that were intentionally disconnected. The more a man leans into authenticity and connection, the more his system reorganizes around coherence.
Q: Why is community so central to the model?
Marcus: Healing does not happen in isolation. The nervous system evolved to co-regulate.
In community, signals of safety multiply. Facial cues, shared rhythm, and presence quiet the stress loop. At Prime, this becomes visible. Men breathe together. Shoulders drop. Hearts synchronize. That is coherence in motion.
When men return home, they carry that imprint. Their families and workplaces feel it. Healing the individual begins healing the ecosystem around him.
Q: What does lasting change actually look like after a retreat like this?
Marcus: It is not a peak experience. It is a new baseline.
Men leave with practices, friendships, and embodied habits that continue expanding after they return home. Focus improves. Relationships deepen. Stress becomes manageable. The nervous system becomes an ally instead of an adversary.
That is why many men describe MELD Prime not as a retreat, but as a reset.
Q: What considerations go into choosing the right retreat?
Marcus: When evaluating a men's retreat, three questions matter most.
Does it work with the body, not just the mind. Sustainable change is bottom-up.
Does it provide integration and community afterward. Without support, change rarely sticks.
Does it honor individual truth over ideology. Healing comes from safety, not conformity.
When body, safety, and community are present, transformation becomes sustainable.
Early movements like Mankind Project and EVRYMAN helped men break emotional silence. They normalized vulnerability and connection. But visibility alone could not evolve the work. The next step required a physiological foundation.
MELD Prime honors what came before while grounding it in neuroscience, somatic regulation, and community-based integration. It shifts men's work from emotional release to functional change.
Where earlier retreats sparked insight, MELD Prime trains the operating system underneath behavior.
Men are often taught to think their way into change. Read another book. Make another plan. Set another intention. But real transformation is physiological.
When a man's body learns safety, his life changes course. Relationships deepen. Focus returns. Connection becomes natural.
That is not philosophy. It is physiology in action.
~~~
Merilee Kern, MBA is an internationally-regarded brand strategist and analyst who reports on cultural shifts and trends as well as noteworthy industry change makers, movers, shakers and innovators across all categories, both B2C and B2B. This includes field experts and thought leaders, brands, products, services, destinations and events. As Founder, Executive Editor and Producer of "The Luxe List," Merilee is a prolific business, lifestyle, travel, dining and leisure industry voice of authority and tastemaker. She keeps her finger on the pulse of the marketplace in search of new and innovative must-haves and exemplary experiences at all price points, from the affordable to the extreme. Her work reaches multi-millions worldwide via broadcast TV (her own shows and copious others on which she appears) as well as a myriad of print and online publications. Connect with her at www.TheLuxeList.com / Instagram www.Instagram.com/MerileeKern / Twitter www.Twitter.com/MerileeKern / Facebook www.Facebook.com/MerileeKernOfficial / LinkedIN www.LinkedIn.com/in/MerileeKern.
